Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Let The Truth Be Told...

I am tired of living a life based on hiding from true reality and one founded on the spreading of lies and mistruths. For most of my life, and especially since coming to Korea, I have led one campaign of coverup after another. I have finally come to a place where I'm prepared to tell my deepest and darkest secrets - things unknown to even my family and closest friends. For so long, I haven't allowed myself the utter relief that this revealing process will certainly deliver, by constantly repressing the desire to disclose the actual facts and own my mistakes. In hindsight, my failure to uncover these truths has only furthered the concealment of the monkeys on my back, and served to increase their weight. I am aware that my inaction has been attributed to a fear of possible judgment or lack of acceptance, and I have finally resigned myself to accept the power of healing as well as any potential consequences this may cause.

So where to start? Well, as they typically do, things began rather innocently. Out of a need to maintain a sense of normalcy and holding onto routine in the only way I knew, I joined a local **sigh** gym in the early part of last year. As events progressed and life unfolded, I started paying more and more frequent visits. First, it was the lure of the treadmill. Then, it was the bench press. And eventually, I even gave in to the, dare I say it, the kettle bells. Yes... I am, without a doubt, as disgusted as you surely also must be right now and no acceptable excuse legitimizes my despicable actions.

The hardest part of revealing this shameful habit is reminding myself of all the ways I have caused irreparable harm to so many people. The countless nights that I selfishly left barstools vacant, incalculable numbers of kegs untapped and cigarette packages unopened.. Oh god, the damage that I have caused! Will I ever be forgiven?

In my defense, this inclination originally struck me after I fell victim to an insidious scheme perpetuated by many so-called experts. I ignorantly believed doctors and exercise specialists as they spouted hair-brained theories; hackneyed dogma which said things such as how physical exercise promotes self-improvement and -satisfaction, when this shameful practice is, in reality, really only one performed out of arrogance and an unnaturally false conception of independence. Others told me that exercise would provide a relief from stress. Pfsssh!! I've never heard a belief organized around such an unproven and inadequately tested concept! They also duped me into believing that exercise would allow me to remain mentally stable and motivated. What insane notions!

To boot, my addiction to exercise hasn't been my sole vice during these trying times. There has been a more sinister, more pernicious demon lurking beneath my seemingly fanciful expressions and accepting eyes. I hate to admit it, but I'm a recovering norebanger. You may not be aware of this debilitating condition, so let me describe the practice and hopefully bring awareness to this oft-overlooked subject.

Norebang, or what some may slyly refer to as 노래방, was originally a victimless Korean pastime breaking from the traditional, conservative ways of Japanese-style karaoke. In the abundant 'singing room' establishments throughout the country, patrons are assigned to individual rooms for them and any number of guests, and given the minimum of an hour to make song selections, all while gleefully playing tambourines and drumming on any object in sight. The practice of norebang boasts modest beginnings - whose only purpose was to offer stressed Koreans an opportunity of amusement and expression.

However, norebang later adopted an evil side and has now led to a huge number of interrupted lives and fractured homes throughout the continent. This insidious monster has brought with it just enough comfort to gain entrance into people's hearts & minds, slowly destroyed the trust that it built, and left a trail of withered souls in its path. I advise everyone with whom I come into contact to never even consider 'trying' it out, for it is the quintessential wolf in sheep's clothing. And furthermore, anyone who asks you to give it a shot is not your friend and cannot be trusted.

Some might tell you that norebang is an excellent outlet for creativity. Don't believe them; and remember that you could just as easily take part in an alternate & less dehumanizing form of entertainment. These same people may attempt to mislead you by saying norebang affords you a chance to see friends in new & exciting settings (when any moron knows that you should easily remain content by just visiting people in the usual establishments). Other snake oil they might try to sell is that norebang provides momentary sensations of ecstasy - when it is essential to remember that however real these feelings might appear, they are artificial. You must simply become adept at creating happiness out of any routine, however tedious or boring it may seem.

Earlier, attention was drawn to the fact that I am indeed a recuperating norebanger, intending to someday reclaim a normal life for myself. Personally, American karaoke became a gateway activity that led to my ultimate downfall. Not many people know this: but in a former life, I was a contentedly ordinary guy. It wasn't until moving to Asia when I realized that I had a serious problem. After the chronic late nights and constant reminders of smelling to high heaven of microphones, I knew something had to be done. Friday, September 23rd was the last day that I partook, when I was met with an especially irritated vision in my dreams that night. The next morning, I posthaste enrolled in the local community center's NA (Norebangers Anonymous) chapter and began attending the weekly meetings.

I am pleased to announce that last week I was awarded the coveted Ruby Hiker's Pole, signifying completion of the 11th out of 12 stages in the program. Tonight, I will attempt the final stage of the program, whose goal is to reintroduce a sustainable form of norebang into a person's life. It will be a grand event where I hope to prove to myself and the world that I am able to cope with this struggle and maintain a sense of composure through our dealings. Please pray for me as I venture into uncharted territory, for I know not what the future holds...

Monday, November 21, 2011

Cultural Foundations and/or Manifestations

Recently, I've become particularly interested in attempting to identify behaviors and related actions for their true nature, considering why they are the way that they are, and wondering what might lead to the mentalities that contribute to the formed behaviors. Given my current residence, I've chosen to generalize South Korean culture through making it a target of this analysis. Specifically, the following are three aspects of this culture that have been of unique interest to me:

1) Testing as a way of life
I feel that this topic requires a bit of technicality, so pardon the statistics. But I believe that the figures help to clearly illuminate a point.

Thursday, Nov 10 for the country was this year's national CSAT (College Scholastic Ability Test) -ing Day for high school seniors and it was astonishing to watch the entire country turn out with tremendous uncompromising support for the students. This one day serves as the culmination of years of studying and sleepless nights, and the highest degree of relief for thousands of anxious parents. Every year on this single testing day, the stock market opening is delayed, transportation (not excluding air traffic) is re-routed and schedules are adjusted, even police escorts can be hailed by time-pressed test takers. And, to borrow a term, testers' friends tailgate before, throughout, and after the 8-hour testing period to cheer on their brothers and sisters in arms. The encouragement and collective solidarity is unquestionably amazing.

On a personal note, my current employer (등용문) is a CSAT preparation school, which means that its sole purpose of existence is to prepare students for this test. The annual student body consists of more than 600 post-high school students who mostly have already taken the test at least once, and so are referred to as retesters. Enrollment for the term occurs in December, students settle into the dormitories in mid-January, and classes commence a week later. The coed students then spend the following nearly 10 months digesting mathematics, science, Korean & English language, psychology, and a sprinkle of athletics. Finality of the semester is grandly celebrated with massive festivities and outpourings of emotion.

CNN put it best when they commented that "this one test...will determine which university [the students] enter. It is considered the chance to make or break one's future." I think this concept well shows the excellent notion that hard work and persistence can produce all of the benefits and advantages sought after. But there are of course significant downsides to years of sole focus on academics, identification that results of this one test are the only means of finding one's place in society, and the obvious inordinate stress that these pressures put on a teenager. Perhaps on an unrelated note, or maybe not, Korea experiences 100+ cases of adolescent and young adult suicide every year; and suicide has been named the leading cause of death for the Korean 15-24 age group.

Here's a funny video commentary on the daily life of a Korean student.

In an effort to quantify education beyond high school, I have turned to the 2011 OECD Education at a Glance report. According to the most recently available statistics in Table A3.3 (pg 70), the graduation rate for Korean tertiary type-A programmes (university/college) was 44.5%, well above the OECD average of 37.8%. Fantastic. The same report also points out some additional interesting figures on Table C5.1a (pg 373). Astoundingly, average annual hours worked per worker for Korea were 2,243, compared to an OECD average of only 1,710. This quite possibly has largely contributed to the South Korean economy's ranking (according to the IMF - International Monetary Fund - and the CIA World Factbook) as 12th in the world, in terms of purchasing power parity (PPP). But discouragingly, the same chart on page 373 also shows that in the Job-related non-formal continuing education category, the participation rate of Korean workers was a mere 11%, compared to an OECD average of 28%. Although I believe the term non-formal may pose a hangup to the Korean education system (where formality is the path to properness), this certain piece of data is nonetheless dramatic.

2) 빨리, 빨리!!
This repetitive and familiar phrase is pronounced bbahlli, and basically translates to the adverb part of speech meaning fast/quickly/rapidly. Other common and widely used phrases are:
  • 빨리: which literally means to do [something] quickly and conjugates the verb form of the word to suggest the imperative form of 'hurry up'.
  • 빨리: which advises the listener to immediately hurry over here. This verbal argument is also usually complemented by a waving gesture or an arm grab.
To many Koreans and visitors alike, compliance with the above requests is met out of a sense of duty. If someone emphatically asks you to join them, the only correct action is to acquiesce, right? But frustratingly, upon the meeting, it frequently becomes apparent that there is no fire that requires immediate extinguishing or, furthermore, any need to have dropped the task that you were prematurely abandoning. The intention of the behest, more accurately, seems to be one born out of an understanding of the human need for forming & maintaining social connections.

There are also many more pragmatic applications for the notion of bbahlli in a crowded country such as Korea and a hectic city such as Seoul. For many tasks and activities, if they aren't met with a sense of urgency, they will fail or an opportunity will be missed. Take precise bus and subway schedules and any deadline or time-sensitive task for instance where initial punctuality is a directly conditional event for any result to occur. Without this promptness, the entire system of precision is worthless. Therefore, the actions are necessary for the resulting effects and then, the resulting effects are essential for similar processes to repeat; otherwise, the entire order crumbles.

3) Military conscription
As per the country's established Conscription Law, all able-bodied Korean males are required to serve in either the ROK military for 21-26 months (depending on the branch) or satisfy a civil service requirement for 25-36 months. This reality and the volume of manpower it creates contributes to one of the largest standing armed forces in the world, with a reported personnel strength of more than 8.6 million troops in 2010, dwarfing countries such the US - who maintains slightly over 3 million.

The need for a mass of troops, and so a relevant mandatory conscription are obvious. Since the aftermath of World War II and especially throughout the 1950's, the peninsula has experienced constant tension which has created the never-ending obligation of readiness. The demilitarized zone (DMZ) alone requires constant manning by many of these 8.6 million troops.

Having also served in the military - with a fundamental culture all of its own, I feel that I am now in a unique informed position as an objective cultural observer. Simplistically, much of the time spent in the military can be reduced to the maxim hurry up and wait. Another commonly heard - and mirrored counterpart of the previous - phrase to describe military service is that it is composed of hours of boredom punctuated by moments of sheer terror. Both of these ideas relate to the nature of intense preparation for the event of a future critical job, followed by subsequent long periods of vigilance.

What might all of this mean?
Now, with these specific three examples, by what symbols might they be represented? Are they correlated or does one even lead to another? If so, which logically compel another/the others - and are we looking at maybe a chicken, a white egg, and a brown egg? Or should we consider these aspects as completely independent issues? Then, maybe they should more likely be a chicken, a kumquat, and a hammer..

I imagine all these aspects of Korean culture to be interrelated somehow, seemingly all sharing some of the same qualities. Are not preparation/promptness/readiness all much the same concepts, or at least, originate in the same place(s) and able to realize similar desired benefits? As for correlation and causation, that topic still seems to be up in the air.